Answer to Question 1
As Amato (2000) explains, the stress and adjustment trajectory of a divorce depends on the person, the stressors associated with the divorce, and the moderators or protective factors that serve as shock absorbers for the impact of the divorce. Research indicates that the result of this divorce-stress-adjustment process is that some people show a boost in well-being following a divorce (e.g., a person leaving an abusive partner), others experience a temporary crisis that improves after a transition period until well-being returns to normal levels (the majority), and still others move into a downward spiral from which they never fully recover (Amato, 2000).
Answer to Question 2
During the first stage of negotiation, each partner can assertively express his or her interests. Both partners can use active listening to process and clarify an understanding of the other's needs. Feedback of understandings helps to convey that each is understood and promotes empathy. Then, in the second stage, the couple will move from discussion of interests to proposals for action. The idea is to present a proposal that best satisfies the needs of both individuals. Proposals can be met with counterproposals that move each closer to their ultimate objectives until they reach a compromise. If, however, an acceptable compromise cannot be reached, then one party can suggest a time out (e.g., Let's take a break and talk about it later today), and the subject can be revisited later until a solution is found. Persistence is an important attribute for success in this process. Exiting a disagreement gracefully by taking a time out, agreeing to disagree, or focusing on the positives are important actions to take to maintain overall harmony in relationships when frustrations run high.
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